How Frenchies Can Tell You're American

A positive aspect of traveling is that it shows you how other people live. An equally valuable side-effect is that shows you how you live. You might have never noticed your notebook as being a sign of your country, but go to school in another nation and everyone wants to see your paper with holes in it.

As a culture that spreads itself over other countries without leaving much room for reciprocation, it is easy to forget that not everyone lives the way Americans do. With that in mind, I have compiled a list of things that Americans might not know are somewhat specific to our culture (at least, in reference to my experiences in France):

1. The words unique, special, original, and different have positive connotations.

In French, these words are used to politely describe something or someone that is “weird.” If you were to see a girl in an outfit you didn’t like, you could describe her as “original” with no ambiguity as to your meaning.

2. Ketchup can be eaten on scrambled eggs, baked potatoes, and quiche.

Ketchup does not have a wide range of uses in France, they’re bigger fans of mayonnaise.

3. If Americans want to cook something quickly, they microwave it (see: potatoes).

Microwaving is almost expressively used for reheating, never for cooking/baking.

4. In the US, you eat pizza with your hands.

You can only eat pizza with your hands if you’re among friends your age and they all agree it’s okay to do.

5. Americans eat French fries with their hands, not tiny plastic forks provided by the establishment.

Yeah, tiny forks, incredible.

6. Americans know (and often love) what a pb&j is.

French people have heard of peanut butter, but the concept of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich breaks the barriers of their culinary imaginations.

7. Americans have generally positive perceptions of other forms of English (Australian English, British English, Canadian English).

French people love mocking Quebecois French and have expressed to me many times that it is a completely different language. Then again, I think this is the way the English view American English, so maybe we're on the wrong side of the fence.

8. You probably do not know anyone who has been to Madagascar or Tunisia.

I have met many people who have vacationed in these countries, mostly because they are more accessible from this location than the US.

9. In the US, when someone says they were taught English, you assume it was American English.

They were probably taught British English.

10. You know a lot of people who have been to Mexico.

The French think of a trip to Mexico as very fancy due to the distance.

11. In the US, you are barefoot when you’re inside your house.

When I am at home (in France), I always wear slippers. If I visit a friend, I take off my shoes and s/he gives me "guest slippers" to wear.

12. You wear sweats outdoors.

If you’re leaving the house (or even your bedroom) in France, you better look awake.

13. You eat on the go.

I have a non-French friend who scarfs down toast in an alley before work because if Frenchies see her eating food while walking, she'll get the stink eye.

14. In the US, you bring beverages into the classroom, whether you’re the student or the teacher.

You can’t even bring water bottles into the classroom without breaking some serious norms (there is a working theory among some American ex-pats that the French are a dehydrated people). A couple of times I have brought tiny espressos to my 8am classes and been not-so-subtly instructed to finish my drink before entering the classroom (in other news, telling someone to chug a hot beverage is cruel).

15. Americans have the option of taking coffee to go.

First of all, coffee comes in the size and form of espresso. Secondly, it comes in tiny mugs only (major French cities excluded).

16. In the US, you think of people who smoke as “smokers,” as in a particular group that is different from you or that you identify as being a part of.

If one were to walk into a French party and say "hey, anyone smoke? Wanna go outside?" there would be no one left in-doors except some of the pregnant women.

17. When eating a meal, if you are not cutting food then you do not need your knife.

If you eat a meal in France, you’ll use the knife with your left hand to help guide your food onto your fork (this is applicable to most countries in Europe, it seems). If you do not use your knife in this fashion, you might be referred to as having "uncivilized" or "savage" eating habits. This may or may not be the catalyst for an existential crisis.

18. Many Americans have over 500 friends on facebook.

Frenchies don’t have as many cyberpals. When they see my 700 friend count, they react by saying, "you're American."

19. In the US, you understand lyrics to songs because they’re in your language.

Whenever I’m at a party and American songs play, a Frenchie makes the joke, “What’s it like to understand the songs?” Pretty similar to not understanding.

20. When people from other countries ask you where you’re from, you say the state instead of the country, assuming that they know all the states.

They don't know all the states; it reinforces the stereotype that Americans think they’re the center of the world.

21. In the US, when someone hands you bread for your meal, you put it on your plate.

In France, bread is eaten at every meal, and always placed directly on the table.

22. When a song says “put your hands in the air,” Americans do it.

The French don’t understand American lyrics, so they don’t respond to the commands. Also, French songs wouldn’t tell the listeners to put their hands in the air because it’s not a dance form in France.

23. When you dance with someone else, you touch each other.

Inebriated individuals excluded, in France you’ll probably just do something similar to the jitterbug with your partner, unless salsa music is playing, in which case you'll get down.

24. Americans hug.

Hugging in France is considered really personal, they prefer totally not intimate cheek kisses.

25. When Americans enter a party, they only greet people they know.

If you enter a French party, you go around and greet every person present with either a handshake or cheek kisses.

26. If you're American, you probably do not know how to drive stick.

Almost everyone in Europe drives stick in the same way that almost everyone in the US drives automatic.

27. Americans don't know what endives are, or how to eat them.

If you come to France, you'll find out.